Monday, September 10, 2007

Voicing my Resolve for her Collar

Last night Ms B reminded me that we are focused on a D/s relationship and the present course will eventually lead us to a dramatic and unpleasant climax. Imagining that this event would be designed to test my resolve in a moment of time where I would experience the worst that I could be subjected to once I commit my submission to her. During this event, she might require me to make a decision to kneel for her collar, or walk away. Will I give the same answer over voice compared to if we were face to face in real life? If I beg for her collar in voice and she tests my resolve, does that hold as much weight as testing my resolve in real life situation? If I persevere and she chooses to collar me in voice, I would imagine that the contract we make would be just as valid and binding if we were to meet in person in the future. So how do I make a confident and informed decision if I do not have real life, face to face experiences to base my decision upon? Ms B tells me that she is the same person in real life as the person I have come to know in cyber space. Based on the voice conversations I have with her, I believe that I can confidently take a leap of faith and base my decision on my impression of her so far. When the day comes and she tests my resolve to submit for her collar, I believe that the sum total of my emotional attachment and positive experiences will far out weigh the short term discomfort of her test.

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