The unconditional relationship is our foundation

August 1, 2007 The unconditional relationship is our foundation
The moment that I submitted to Ms B I became dependant upon her to permit me to seek satisfaction for my wants and desires. My needs are met, why would I want to stress her out more by placing demands upon her? Perhaps this is where I came up with the idea of earning more from her. I thought that if I were to go above and beyond the call of duty that she might say to her self that perhaps my boy deserves to have his wants and desires met. I had failed to see that I cannot earn something that she has not expressed as needing to be earned. She tends to my needs and gives to me when it suits her needs, wants and desires. Just as it should be with your best friends, or the married couple, or the parent with a child, or putting up with the badly behaving pet, you have unconditional relationships. You give of your self without expecting something in return. The fact that you feel like contributing to the relationship is a sign that the relationship is healthy. Unconditional in the sense that while they might accidentally hurt you or let you down, that you still are open to them and do not lock the door behind. For example, I took initiative to create a painted wood surface for our front deck because I felt confident that I knew what Ms B was wanting to see. After she logged out for the day I searched my inventory and placed a few samples down but I could not find what we discussed. I wanted to succeed in my task and buy some decking but I could not leave the property by her very order. I could have attempted to impose upon people to help me achieve my goals but I feel that their time is more valuable then resolving my problem. Despite my sense of failure I was consoled in the knowledge that my relationship with Ms B is unconditional. She can have some fun in dealing with my failures but no matter how extraordinary our contribution, or pathetic our failures, it will not alter the foundation of our relationship.