August 3, 2007 A friend discovers my bad behaviour
Staying in the property of Ms B’s SL home I was playing with my inventory for a good part of the evening until one of my friends greeted me through Yahoo instant messenger. We started chatting and one thing lead to the next where I discussed the exciting events occurring in my life. To give my friend a better perspective I offered an explicit open look at my journal entries in my blog. My friend took a great deal of time and effort to read my entries and pointed out a number of significant issues that we discussed. The most significant issue was my passive aggressive comment about not wishing to discuss the details of my feeling regarding having a brother join our family. My friend pointed out that I had betrayed the intent of my journal by with holding my feelings and by testing to see if Ms B would call me out on this issue. Although it pains me greatly to both admit my failings and describe the feelings that I with held from Ms B, I shall start to make amends. I look down upon people and myself when I see the feelings of jealousy growing and festering. I should be mature enough to deal with my emotions but you can imagine how difficult it is for a person to share there loved one with a rival. Ms B and I had discussed the situation in advance and I agreed to accept and supported her decision despite my hidden reservations. I have seen how many Dom/me commonly collect a harem and as a submissive I feel I must accept any decision made by my Domme or choose to end the relationship if I cannot find peace of mind. I had thought that a third person in our family would reduce the time I get to spend with Ms B. Some people think that competition brings out the best in people, but in my experiences I have only seen the worst and this was one of the very reasons I quit racing. All this negativity is depressing so I look on the bright side and say that a brother would add a new and interesting dynamic to the family. I know that more males serving to please Ms B would entertain her greatly and seeing her happy will make me happy. So far I have not had to deal with any feelings regarding a third member added to our family but if some thing changes I must remember to express my feelings in the appropriate time and place. As for my two counts of misbehaviour, I willing submit myself to her for what ever punishment she sees fit.
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